Parental refers to the extent to which the parent expects and demands mature, responsible behavior.

As children mature, parent-child relationships naturally change. Preschool and grade-school children are more capable, have their own preferences, and sometimes refuse or seek to compromise with parental expectations. This can lead to greater parent-child conflict, and how conflict is managed by parents further shapes the quality of parent-child relationships. So, what can parents do to nurture a healthy self-concept?

Parental refers to the extent to which the parent expects and demands mature, responsible behavior.
The quality of our relationship with early caregivers has an effect on later psychological and social development. Mothers Love [Image by Premnath Thirumalaisamy CC BY – NC https://www.flickr.com/photos/premnath/22998680924]

Diana Baumrind (1971, 1991) thinks parenting style may be a factor. The way we parent is an important factor in a child’s socioemotional growth. Baumrind developed and refined a theory describing parenting styles based on two aspects of parenting that are found to be extremely important:

  • Parental responsiveness, which refers to the degree the parent responds to the child’s needs.
  • Parental demandingness, is the extent to which the parent expects more mature and responsible behavior from a child.

Using these two dimensions, she recognized three different parenting styles:

Authoritarian (Too Hard): the authoritarian parenting style is characterized by high demandingness with low responsiveness. The authoritarian parent is rigid, harsh, and demanding. Abusive parents usually fall in this category (although Baumrind is careful to emphasize that not all authoritarian parents are abusive).

Permissive (Too Soft): this parenting style is characterized by low demandingness with high responsiveness. The permissive parent is overly responsive to the child’s demands, seldom enforcing consistent rules. The “spoiled” child often has permissive parents.

Authoritative (Just Right): this parenting style is characterized by high demandingness with huge responsiveness. The authoritative parent is firm but not rigid, willing to make an exception when the situation warrants. The authoritative parent is responsive to the child’s needs but not indulgent. Baumrind makes it clear that she favors the authoritative style.

Parental refers to the extent to which the parent expects and demands mature, responsible behavior.
Table 1. Comparison of four parenting styles.

Parenting Styles and Culture

Of the four parenting styles, the authoritative style is the one that is most encouraged in modern American society. American children raised by authoritative parents tend to have high self-esteem and social skills; however, effective parenting styles vary as a function of culture and, as Small (1999) points out, the authoritative style is not necessarily preferred or appropriate in all cultures. In contrast to the authoritative style, authoritarian parents probably would not relax bedtime rules during a vacation because they consider the rules to be set, and they expect obedience. This style can create anxious, withdrawn, and unhappy kids. It is important to point out that authoritarian parenting is as beneficial as the authoritative style in some ethnic groups (Russell, Crockett, & Chao, 2010). For instance, first-generation Chinese American children raised by authoritarian parents did just as well in school as their peers who were raised by authoritative parents (Russell et al., 2010). Not surprisingly, children raised by permissive parents tend to lack self-discipline, and the permissive parenting style is negatively associated with grades (Dornbusch, Ritter, Leiderman, Roberts, & Fraleigh, 1987).

The permissive style may also contribute to other risky behaviors such as alcohol abuse (Bahr & Hoffman, 2010), risky sexual behavior especially among female children (Donenberg, Wilson, Emerson, & Bryant, 2002), and increased display of disruptive behaviors by male children (Parent et al., 2011). There are some positive outcomes associated with children raised by permissive parents. They tend to have higher self- esteem, better social skills, and report lower levels of depression (Darling, 1999).

During what development stage are conflicts between parents and their children typically at their highest?

In general, conflict increases in early adolescence, reaches its height in mid-adolescence (ages 14-16), and declines in late adolescence (ages 17-18). Many of the changes that define adolescence can lead to conflict in parent-adolescent relationships.

What are the two components of parenting?

The current model is comprised of two components of parenting: the parent's responsiveness and the parent's demandingness. Responsiveness is the connection that the parent facilitates through love, affection, warmth, and support. Unresponsive parents may ignore a child's need for connection or even reject the child.

What is adolescent parenting?

Adolescent parenting refers primarily to women and men nineteen years or younger who give birth to and elect to parent a child. Although most adolescent pregnancies are unintended, an increasing number of pregnant adolescents choose to continue the pregnancy and become parents.

What is the role of parents during adolescent stage?

Creating an atmosphere of honesty, mutual trust, and respect. Creating a culture of open communication at family meal times. Allowing age appropriate independence and assertiveness. Developing a relationship that encourages your child to talk to you.